new monster

dive into
high gold
as if it were

water.
searching the
caverns
of my body

for you

silence

waiting

veronicate

it might be  enough,
i think,
to wait--

i learn it from
the empty parts--

from the spaces,

where the gold
settled

where the gold
flows
thickly,

thick
enough.

raucous freshness

the gold was time
or longing

the gold was the root
of my tongue

all tastes at its base.

i was untethered
but i didn't notice.

sky had stretched, scratching at itself like trees' leaves,
over the lintel of the door like
a smear of blue paint.

i had been still in a corner
amidst dead leaves,
covered in them,
like a bad dog

with my back to the door

as its hinges
moved.

dearest

something
i had dug
through
for

down past
what had seemed
impenetrable

through
solid

or what had seemed solid.

i dug two holes through it
and wore it
like a mask

i had dug
through

to see you.

the gold was
veronicate:

something i filled
something i
pressed

pressed my face
into

resonance

no point in swallowing
i let it roll
from the corners of my lips

overfull and
unfed...

the buck with
its golden horns

its nostril rimmed
with gold

as if it were
a statue,
so still.

the scent of pine
almost blue
in the nose

i was not choking.
i was not choking.
i was not falling
into the pool,
the water so clean
spotlessly clean
because everything
in it
turned to gold
and drifted
to the bottom.

i do not dare you now
because there is nothing to dare,
i am so still

i was not alone

because god lifted me
in his golden palm.

ich grolle nicht

you thrust deep
into the heart
of each cell
of my blood
a gold coin

so that i am flushed
and heavy
with your
worth